Merry Christmas!

Well it is that time of year again! Christmas! And this year is very very special to Wayne and I! It is Zackary's first Christmas, well not really his First, but his first here at home!

Last year at this time, he was still at Tampa General Nicu! I don't think I'll ever forget Christmas Eve (maybe years later I will). On Christmas Eve, Wayne and I had planned on staying in Zackary's room in the Nicu just so we could be with him on Christmas Morning (we had to be back to Polk County to get together with my family for Christmas later on that day). As we had everything packed with us in the room and started getting settled in to spend the night with him in his room, I started not being able to relax, there was too much beeping going on and his stats were unstable at the time and I just knew it was gonna be A LONG LONG night if we stayed there!

I finally convinced Wayne that we should go to the Hotel (they had discounts for people who had someone in the hospital, and they were like 2 miles from the hospital), well as we packed up our stuff again and started heading out, Zackary ended up having Brady's (where the heart rate drops below 100). And of course that totally alarmed us! Wayne did not have peace at that time to leave him and I felt the same. The nurse did her assement to figure out why he was having these brady's and could not figure out what was wrong. She ended up calling the resident and they were gonna be on their way as soon as they were done with another baby at the time.

Well earlier that day, I was holding Zackary and his feeding tube had come out, I told his nurse at that time that it had come out and she put it back in. I kinda thought at the time that she put that in pretty quickly but only shrugged off as to "I"m sure she has done this several times". And let it go at that! Little did I know that that information and noticing that would pay off later.

Wayne and I went into the parent's lounge while the nurse did all she could for Zackary to find out why he was having a brady and we prayed that God would give us peace and guide the nurses hand as to what was going on with him. Suddenly as we got done praying, the event of the feeding tube being put in too fast was brought back to remembrance. I asked the nurse to step out of Zackary's room for a second and told her what had happened that day! And she went back in and pulled his feeding tube out and sure enough there was a curve in the tube that was not suppose to be there.

When she pulled it out Zackary's heart rate went back to where it was suppose to be right away. And he gave us a smile of relief like "HELLO, I've been trying to tell you that for awhile now!" After the nurse got the feeding tube back in there the RIGHT way. We felt at peace and knowing that God had it all along and we were able to leave the hospital with such relief and peace to go have a peaceful Christmas Eve. Oh yeah, we never did see the resident who was on call that night, didn't need to after we found out it was the feeding tube.

Boy what a Christmas we had last year! But you know what we have a normal healthy 13 month old now! Who is FULL of energy (wish I had his energy at times).

It was very hard Christmas last year, so hard we barely even celebrated it (which Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year). Yes we know what Christmas is all about and how God gave us his son so that we might have life and his promises to be unveiled! But our focus was on our son to get him better and whole and come home to us. God's promises have come true and continue to be true to us!

When life seems to get you down and you just don't think you can do it anymore (btw I know this feeling all to well) look up to God who is your provider and protector, you can't go wrong with him! That is who we looked up to on that Christmas Eve when we couldn't figure out what was going on with Zackary and we needed guidance and peace, and God came thru in a awesome way that night!!


We hope and pray that everyone has a very blessed and awesome Christmas! Not just with your family and friends but for the reason we celebrate Christmas all together! If it had not been for God sending his son to us, I don't know where I would be and I really don't want to know. I am glad to have a mighty God who knows what I need in the time of need!

Merry Christmas! And have a blessed and prosperous New Year~2012!

Hasbargen Family

What a Year!

                          As most of you know my son was born premature.

Well he is now a healthy 17lb 10 and 1/2 month old. Soon we will be celebrating his first birthday (hard to believe).

Man, what a year! Coming upon Wayne and I's second wedding anniversary, I can't help but look back this year and feel very very blessed. Around our first year anniversary is when we discovered we were expecting our son. However, in that discovery we didn't realize all that we were gonna be going thru!

With him being in the Nicu for 3 and half months. I can definitely say we never stopped and asked God "why?" We didn't have to. We knew God had the whole situation. And boy did he ever (as I have had posted before).

When Zackary was in the Nicu, his PDA was not closing on its own. So they treated him 3 different times to get it closed (the third time finally worked). But his PFO was opened and had been opened after we came home with him!

Well, I can praise God for today's report with the cardiologist: His PFO is closed!! YAY!!! And we got released from the cardiologist as well (that felt real good). She also cleared him for his hernia surgery for next week. I'll say it again and again: GOD IS FAITHFUL.

As we come upon his first birthday (and his daddy's birthday, Zackary was born on his daddy's birthday. Only God could orchestrate that) Wayne and I can't help but reflect on the goodness of God and realize God has not forgotten us or you! He is faithful and is always there no matter the situation.

I can't help but pray over the nicu everytime I think about it, just cause there are other people going thru what we went thru and I know prayer works. The day we left TGH (Tampa General Hospital) I prayed over the room Zackary was in and asked God to be there for the next baby as he was for us!

Just remember God is a faithful God and He loves you!!! 

Expecting Great things...

     We are expecting great things in our house, and we are starting to see the results from it! 


     Since Zackary was born prematurely, we weren't sure what the outcome for development would be for him! Yes we stood on Faith (and still do to this day) that God would see us thru for this little one! And we knew he would! Lately, I have been praying over his development (maybe after he had been home for a few months did I start doing this). I would always pray that the doctors would be amazed and couldn't explain how far he has come a long. Don't get me wrong Zackary did not have any issues with brain development or any of that kind. Just wanted him to be on track with the other babies or beyond where he should be!

      Expecting these things to come to pass! I kept hearing to start expecting it to come together and work for good! Well, we ended up selling his swing (he no longer used it) and we bought him an exersaucer, we kinda thought he might still be to little for it. But expecting that he would do great in this exersaucer and God did not fail! We have the exersaucer for 3 weeks now and Zackary has made some leaps and bounds (by the way, I don't think the exersaucer did all this but God did, I do think it was our answer to help Zackary out). Our baby boy is learning to reach up and he is about ready to blow raspberries and he knows how to turn in his exersaucer. He actually scooted some on his belly. He is learning to roll over more!

     Now I don't know what the regular is for a baby to be at but I am believing and expecting that my son is developing the way he should be and beyond! And that God has it under control!


     Not only are we expecting great and mighty things for Zackary but in our lives in general! I am excited and yet I don't know what I'm excited about except God is still on the throne and holds it all! God is good and I can't deny that he is at work!!!

Frustrated

Why is it that when you try your best in things or with people that you pretty much get slapped in the face?

                       Why can't people get along with people, isn't this how God wanted it?

     I understand that people get hurt, but aren't we suppose to let it all go and move on with life and try to act like nothing ever happened? And when you visit that person or people (which ever the case maybe) that all you want is to be welcomed and not feel like you are some kind of stranger in their home or in their presence of some sort! 

      No matter how hard you try to get a long with that person it never seems like its enough, I'm pretty sure God wants us to forgive and forget. He does that with us when we call upon his name! Yes, I have these questions and honestly I can't not persuade people to let things go, that is between them and God. No matter how hard I try or you try people are gonna do what people what they want to do! It does make living life a little bit harder!
      I just don't understand why people get so mad about the little things so much and so quickly. I have come a long way in my life on trying to actually enjoy the little things in life and the people who are in my life no matter how much we don't like each other or just simply don't get a long!
      Do you ever wonder if actually talking to the person actually would help, no matter how many times you have talked to them? And then at the same time you don't want to be an immature person!

      This title fits this blog very well... And I guess you can say its kinda venting! I guess I will never understand, which could be okay! 

Wants to sleep!

     For the past 4 nights (at least) I have not been able to sleep until at least 4 in the morning, all I can say to that is UGH! And just as I am getting to finally zonk out, Zackary wakes up ready for his first bottle of the night!!!

     Anyways, I have a lot on my mind the past few nights, from what God is doing in my life to how can I be a better mommy and wife, from is there a way I could have done our wedding better (that started tonight) to wonder what we plan on doing this weekend (except try to have a little bit of date).

     I am so ready for this not sleeping when I want to lay my head down and go to dream land. Then I pray that when I do it is sweet sleep and that I will have sweet dreams. Literally by the time I'm ready to be asleep, either my husband is getting up and getting ready for work or when he calls me to tell me he made it to work! 


     I am praying and hoping that this is not a trend that will last forever. I happen to like my sleep (maybe a little to much). I know that I'm in God's hands and that I will be able to sleep and get most of the sleep I need to function during the day. Honestly, I can't wait for this weekend so my husband can take over the night shifts with Zackary, funny thing is is when he is taking over Zackary tends to sleep better. I guess Zackary likes to have both of us around! Makes him feel comforted (Awww, I love my baby!). 


      I also have this nervousness going on too, I actually know what that is, that is, a week from today I have a cardiologist appointment. I know everything will be fine because God's got it! But still a little nerve racking. And I know that is what is causing the nervousness because everytime I think of it I get nervous, HA!

     Okay well I guess enough venting or whatever you want to call it. Plz pray that I will be able to get my sleep back on track and be able to sleep when I lay my head down on the pillow at night! And that my mind or anything for that matter does not keep me distracted, no matter what the case maybe! Thank you for the prayers in advance and I know they work! 

Therapy for me!

      If I can't get out and do what I want to anymore because of being a mom. *Can't just drop what I'm doing and leave the house, its not so easy anymore!* So, there is this... Blogging! 




       Got the best news today from Zackary's doctor. It was his 6month check-up. He is now 12lbs and 4oz. He is also 24 1/2" long. I posted on Facebook "YAY God", cause without Zackary eating and God's hand being over this little one, then wouldn't be as far as we are! You may sit there and think big whoop 12lbs 4oz., well let me tell you this is a big deal for us. Zackary weighed 2lbs 4oz when he was born. And he was 13 1/2" long. He might have been small at the time but he sure was a strong and mighty little baby! Anyways, it felt good to hear the doctor say "good job!" (which I didn't hear him my husband did).

        I have been blessed beyond measure in my life. But I sit back and reflect on my life from over a year ago, from marrying my best friend to have a baby that was born early. I can't help but sit there and look at God being in all of what I have gone thru over the last year and some months. 


        Don't get me wrong there are days I'm stressed out and saying okay God I need your help now plz. And all awhile he hasn't left me and never will. Just in turn I need to give it all to him and worry! And be patient (and if you know me you know that is not an easy thing for me to do).

        SN: Only if the NICU nurses could see our Zackary now and what God is doing in his life!!! :D 

Go God

      Who knew that when I wanted to my little boy to be named "Zackary", when I was a little girl. I fell in love with the meaning of the name, which means: "God will remember." Never did I imagine that that saying would actually come to a reality.

       Where do I start? Well in October of 2010, the week of our first year of marriage, we found out we were expecting. Never have I felt such fear for myself let alone my unborn baby. See, I was born with a congenital heart defect in 1983, and the doctors kept telling my parents (as I grew up) that I should not have kids at all, because it could kill me. Well, the middle of October we went and made sure that the baby was fine (come to find out at that point I was about 24 weeks along already and our pastor's mom had said God hid him for a bit knowning what doctors would try to do and we knew that was not an option). Thank God that the baby was fine and the heartbeat was strong! We had our first (and only) ultrasound of our baby, really didn't expect to find out what we were having (by the way, the we I am referring to my husband and I) but my husband saw before I did that we were having a baby boy. I remember laying there in shock still first off to find out I was truly pregnant and looking at my baby on the screen and two our baby was a boy! I knew right off we had to pick Zackary, it was pressing on my heart to name him this. Thankfully my husband agreed! So, as I progressed in my pregnancy I only saw the OB one time at 25 weeks.
        Four days later, by this time I was 26 weeks along,  my husband had to work over night, well at 5:30 am he gets home and I'm having pain and I was just thinking it was my baby boy was laying on my bladder, and then all of a sudden I was bleeding heavily. Oh and by the way, Zackary would KICK (my strong boy). So, my husband rushed me to the nearest hospital cause by this time the bleeding got worse, come to find out the pain I was having was contractions, go figure. Well, my husband took me Lake Wales Medical Center in Lake Wales, FL where they do not deliever babies at all. I don't know what happened much after we got to the hospital I was pretty much losing so much blood they had trouble getting my blood pressure. When I first saw the blood, I knew it was not good and my first thought and scared thought was OH NO my baby. Well, never underestimate God, but at that moment I felt him Kick as hard as he normally did. Apparently, they kept up with the baby's heart rate at the hospital and everytime I heard it I thanked God.
         My husband in all of this was amazing. He would keep praying over me as long as he could be with me. He definitely stood in FAITH that day!  They ended up doing an emergency c-section. And on November 1st, 2010 at 9:57 am Zackary was born. We also gave him the middle name "Josiah" which means: "God will save". Who knew those two meanings would come in handy for our son.
         Well Zackary was flown to Tampa General Hospital in Tampa, FL where he stayed in the NICU there for 3 and half months. We have stood in prayer and stood in Faith and claimed things for him too, over this little one that yes, God remembered and saved!
          Love how Kenneth E Hagin said, "The bible says it, therefore I believe it, and that settles it." I look back 6 months ago and can't believe what my little family has come thru and God is so good and Amazing! He showed in a mighty way and is continuing to show that too!
          No matter your situation is, remember God is there, just lean on him and stand in what you are believing for, in my husband and I's case was our son and many other things in life!

SN: Zackary Josiah was born on his daddy's birthday. God is good and amazing! Zackary's daddy could add a lot more to what God did on that day! But this is our testament to how good our God is!